Saturday, May 4, 2013

Balance Part 2

It is easy to shift the pendulum to the extreme, but the hardest thing of all is to remain balanced.  I do not want to reach the end of my life only to be measured and be found wanting.  Yet, under God's canopy of grace, the righteousness of Christ has me covered.

At the same time, I know God has purpose for me to fulfill and I do not want to waste my life pursuing the wrong things.  A wise friend recently reminded me that I need to "Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added unto me".  (Matt. 6:33) Surrender to God's kingdom is fought first through prayer. 

Yet, prayer is not a one legged flamingo.  We like to make it that way, all graceful and elegant.  We pray earnestly for God to help us, to be power in our weakness, but then do nothing to obey.  I don't have to know everything to move into action, but I do need to begin.  As I go and do, God leads me to the next step.  Once the foot of prayer has been established, I need to step with the other foot in obedience.  They are a pair.  Both are needed to walk effectively. 

We often pray, "Lord if you're willing, would You do such and such?"  Willing?  God is often ready and eager to help us.  We are the ones refusing to move forward.  Furthermore, God will never do for us what He has instructed us to do.  It's like we dangle that foot in the air and are simply afraid to put it down.  There are times when God must think, "Enough already!  Move off of those knees and get with it!"

I have to admit this is where I am with my writing.  God is asking me to simply exert the discipline to get it done, one chapter at a time, without yet knowing its final end.  A step of obedience followed by another and another.

Likewise with my family, this is how I seek to keep my life balanced.  Prayer with action.  This is not to say I have arrived or that I ever will this side of heaven.  But I do know, that as I step forward in faith, God will make a way where there seems to be no way.

After my day out with my children, my house remains undone.  The basement still needs to be organized to make a place for my oldest daughter.  But if it doesn't happen before she arrives, it will not be the end of the world.  My super mom image might be marred, but that's okay because a greater work is being done in my heart and in the lives of those under my care. . . something greater than a perfect house. 

As I lay down my life, God can cause these desert, dry, selfish places to bloom with His life giving Spirit.  Because except a seed be buried and "die" it remains alone, but if it dies it brings forth much fruit.  (John 12:24)

The struggle, the dying to myself, is worth it because of the triumph that awaits.

God recently answered a huge prayer for me regarding my oldest daughter.  It was a struggle of trust and surrender to His sovereign control, but also study and effort put forth by my daughter.  He didn't have to grant my request, but He did, and I can say with confidence, The Lord is my helper. (Heb. 13:6)  His mercies are new every morning.  Great is His faithfulness. 

'Every day I trust you Lord, woah, I will.'  The song floats from my girls' room as they settle down for the night.  A contented day has come to a close.  What a contrast from the tears of the night before.  The difference of a mom with her own agenda or a mom who lays down her life, prayer and faith paired with obedience.  This is the way of balance. 

(And yes, these delightful girls will be helping me clean that basement.) 

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