tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-40515733900972376142023-11-16T11:29:57.896-08:00Shades of GraceJewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.comBlogger261125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-53512097738241284092016-05-17T09:55:00.000-07:002016-05-17T09:55:17.528-07:00A Stormy SeasonI don't even know what hit me or where it came from. Only that it left me dazzed and threatened to alter my course. Now that the dust has settled I can finally recognize what it is, a test of my faith. <br />
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A storm in the air, my family rushed out the door to a local park where we unfurled a kite. Before long, it rode with the wind, dipping, curling, frolicing, and catching the light. Each of us took turns holding the handles, feeling the tension on the lines and the energy in the air. Delightful! <br />
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Since that day, we've had many tumultous winds, yet, the kite sits in the closet. Safe. And I thought about faith. Certainly, I don't want to miss the joy God has for me by sitting in the closet! And so I venture out into these trials, even though there are no answers, and in some cases, no end. Everything in me wants to resist and to sulk in the closet. Yet, I will never see God's glory if I stay here. <i> Faith is the kite that ventures out to catch the winds!</i><br />
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I noticed something as we were flying our kite that blustery day. None of us focused on our hands. Instead, we were always following the line of the string, looking up, and up, and up, until our necks were sore from all that tilting. Likewise, the struggle of the last few months has caused me to notice something about faith. It always looks forward and upward to our heavenly home. Sometimes the pain can be so large that all I see is my own hands and they shout feeble insufficiency. In this place is only fear and defeat where my soul aches and longs to be set free, for it knows this is not the life I was meant to live. And yet, the tension on the lines is necessary for faith to fly. <br />
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The strings wound up on these handles, though amazingly thin, are strong and connect me to hope. There is glory at the end of this wad, if only I have the courage to unwind the tangle to the One who is in control of all things. Surely, this very trial was divinely orchestrated by God to deepen my faith in Him. I don't want it to be wasted, but rather, to dip, dive, and soar in a dance of beauty. <br />
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And so I wait for Him in surrender, looking, not at my hands, nor at the wad of string, but at the eternal reward. Here I find true joy that is not the opposite of suffering, but rather its companion. <br />
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The winds have not ceased and the problems remain. Yet, in faith I rest, because He is bigger. And in this place I find a peace that surpasses all understanding, a peace that rides on the winds of adversity. <br />
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<i>"...but the message they heard was of no value to them, because those who heard did not combine it with faith." Heb. 4:2</i><br />
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<i>"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." Heb. 11:1</i><br />
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<i><br /></i>Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-31798687219042171292016-03-27T06:27:00.000-07:002016-03-27T06:27:49.718-07:00Comfort My PeopleWhy is it that whenever I face a crisis, Easter becomes more vibrant, more personal? Once again a tradgedy visits my extended family and <b>I am cast into the story</b>, not as an observer, but as a full fledged participator. Last time it was a death. This time an illness like nothing we've ever seen before, one entwined with intricate webs of confusion and exasperation. We struggle and strive, seeking solutions but find ourselves stuck fast, immovable. Baffled, we face reality and ask, "Who will remove the stone for us?"<br />
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Mary comes to the tomb looking for the body of Jesus. She cannot see past her pain. It makes her world so very very small. Caught in the fog, her mind is clouded and she cannot make sense of it all.<br />
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"Why have they taken the body of my Lord?" and "If you have taken Him away, tell me where you have put Him?" she demands through her tears. <span style="font-size: x-small;">(John 20:11-16)</span><br />
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Then she hears her name. "Mary!" <br />
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<i>He knows my name,</i><br />
<i>He sees each tear that falls...</i><br />
<i>And hears me when I call...</i><br />
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Nothing escapes God's notice, no, not even this. I don't understand, but I know the One who calls me. And <b>He.Is.Trustworthy.</b> Period. I have to believe the very real possibility that God has deliberately designated this storm for our family. He knows the waters are dark and choppy, fraught with monstrous waves and relentless wind. All our striving at the oars is futility, and my heart cries out, "Jesus, come to us! Come walking on these waters!"<br />
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Jesus came to Mary, but not in the way she expected. Supposing Him to be the gardener, she did not even recognize Him . . . until she heard her name. Then, at once, she knew who was speaking, not the gardener, but Jesus Himself. I know the presence of Jesus is with us always, yet, sometimes He remains hidden for "without faith it is impossible to please Him." <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Heb. 11:6)</span> <br />
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The tomb was opened, the stone removed, not to let Jesus out, but to let us in. He invites us to come and experience His resurrection power. The storms are His invitation to draw near and trust, to comfort, comfort my people.<br />
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<i>Because He lives I can face tomorrow, </i><br />
<i>Because He lives, all fear is gone,</i><br />
<i>Because I know He holds the future...</i><br />
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Instead of pounding against the obstacles, I step back, and looking out, try to grasp the bigger picture. God may not want me to push through for answers, but rather instead, come alongside, to walk this journey in support and comfort of another. When pain causes our world to shrink, a friend can widen our perspective and make it big. There are smooth plains beyond these stones. I just need eyes to see. <br />
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Jesus is not a ghost, illusive, impersonal, and untangible. No, He is seated at the right hand of God where He waits for His enemies to be made a footstool for His feet. In the meantime, He makes perfect forever, those who are being made holy . . . all because of our risen Savior. <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Heb. 10:12-14)</span> By faith I will wait for Him and trust. Surely, He's got this!<br />
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<i>Thou, O Lord, are a shield about me</i><br />
<i>You're my glory and the lifter of my head. </i> <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Psa. 3:3)</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Hallelujah! He is risen! </span><br />
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<br />Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-29408876014189138942016-03-10T15:21:00.000-08:002016-03-10T17:40:20.570-08:00The Face of KindnessWhen I said my word for the year was to be 'moved with compassion', I never thought it would require conflict. While it may have conjured up an image of the poverty stricken on the other side of the world or even the social issues in my own neighborhood, that's not really what I had in mind. My passion was to simply be a nicer person, to think of others before myself. I know, that sounds so basic. How hard can it be to love, and to practice kindness? As I'm finding out, it is one of the most difficult virtues I have ever pursued.<br />
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Love gets involved in other people's lives, even when its messy, and yes, even when it would be easier to simply ignore the issues and hope they go away. And sometimes, kindness has to confront and make another person feel uncomfortable. Peace does not necessarily mean I say what others want to hear, but rather, it comes only by addressing the issues. More often than not, this involves some conflict. Yet, the conflict can be a good thing, if it produces an end result that is authentic and which truly builds rather than tears down. <br />
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Joseph, (you know, the guy with the coat of many colors), sought reconciliation and healing for his family, but he knew it could never come about until his brothers were willing to face their past. I've never quite understood why Joseph seemed to taunt his brothers before revealing his true identity. It seemed harsh and mean, a stab at revenge, before he succumbed to forgiveness. Yet, I realize now, that it was none of that. In reality, Joseph was moved with<i><b> compassion</b></i>! He was doing what was best for them in a way that caused them to listen. Wow! This kind of love is hard to swallow!<br />
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Past experience has taught me not to bulldoze ahead, nor to speak and later be filled with endless regrets for words that can never be taken back. Instead, I must proceed with great caution and first prepare the way with fervent prayer. But, more often than not, God is waiting for my attitude to be in the right place, so that I am truly moved, not with a critical spirit, but with genuine compassion.<br />
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God has called me to care enough to be involved. Not to meddle, but to build. Not to scold, but to reveal. And so I do the uncomfortable, stepping forward into risky obedience, seeking to come alongside another, offering my heart and my hands in deepest compassion. I never dreamed that this is the place where love would take me, that God might have uniquely positioned me as a tool in His hands "for such a time as this". <br />
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I have an author friend who wrote a book about broken glass, how it can be saudered together to be something more beautiful than it ever was before . . . stained, yes, but now catching the light in vibrant color and designs.<span style="font-size: xx-small;"> (<i>Broken by D</i><i>esign</i> by Koni Attencio)</span> I'm reminded that God never leaves us to flounder in the place of pain, but rather nudges us to move forward. Even if the source of pain is never removed from our lives, we can count on Him to sustain us through it, for He promises a future and a hope. In every trial, He graciously provides an opportunity to build a testimony. No matter how deep the pit, beauty can come from these ashes, for my God is all about redemption. <br />
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<br />Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-51085378918533502882016-03-05T15:24:00.000-08:002016-03-05T15:24:06.577-08:00Welcome SpringWe were standing around in the kitchen, when the subject of death came up. My youngest pipes up with, "I'd rather die before the rapture because I want to be one of those that pops out of the grave." I never tire of the humor that comes out of that child's mouth. <br />
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Yet, on a more serious note, it seems like this is all we've done over the last two weeks is bury, mourn, and contemplate heaven. One right after the other, God has been gathering in His seasoned saints from our church fellowship. But the sting of death is just not there, because we have the assurance of our loved ones in the very presence of God. I never get over the wonder of that thought! Furthermore, during these times, the grace of God is so thick I can almost reach out and tangibly touch it. I'm amazed at how His tender mercies uphold our hearts. <br />
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Only a few days ago, we sang these words at a memorial service<i>, my sin, not in part, but the whole, is nailed to the cross and I bear it no more, praise the Lord, praise the Lord, oh my soul!</i> I sang that verse strong and with all my heart because I am so eager for the day when I will be removed from the presence of sin. Sometimes I get tired of the constant battle, the struggle against it, and I cannot wait to be freed from its pull. And I think, oh what joy, for these believers in Christ, not only to be in God's presence, but to be free from sin's entanglement. <br />
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I find these thoughts of heaven invigorating. I cannot even perceive what it will be like to see Jesus face to face. And I think of these precious elderly saints who, one day were here, and the next moment, are there. Wow! What a sweet sweet salvation is ours! Not to be disrespectful of the grieving, but let laughter fill the air! All week that song by Rebecca St. James has been in my head. I don't think the song was meant for the context of heaven, but I find it fits beautifully. The anticipation of heaven brings such joy! It is amazing beyond amazing what God has in store for those who love Him. <br />
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These individuals who recently passed away all loved Jesus dearly, having followed Him for many many years. I find it peculiar that only hours before they die, they can seem fine. For others it is not like that. There is a greater struggle. And yet, either way, it seems that our health or lack of it doesn't matter so much as we think it does. Sure, we all die from something, but still, "God knew the days ordained for us before one of them came to be," and when our purpose on earth is finished, God takes us. <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Psa. 139:16)</span> But He doesn't take us before then. <br />
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In just a few months, a dear friend turns 100, while only a few weeks later I turn half her age! But it never seems like it. We can talk up a storm on any given afternoon. Yet it does make me wonder. Why are some given more years on earth than others? I firmly believe that it is because their purpose is not yet completed. It is no accident that we are here among this generation and in this time period. We are here on purpose, but we also leave on purpose. I'm so thankful that God knows when the time is right. <br />
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I've recently had a situation come up which gave me cause for great worry. And I wonder, why do I ever worry or get depressed? I think it's because sometimes I live as though I do not really believe in eternity, or else I've forgotten what all is in store on the other side. When Mary went to the tomb to look for Jesus, she was told by the angels, "Why do you look for the living among the dead?" <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Luke 24:5)</span> Perspective makes such a difference in our lives. I know these present troubles are only temporary. My problem has not gone away, and won't for several months, but the assurance that God is in control gives me great enouragement to carry on with joy. <br />
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Most assuredly, <i>the half has not been spoken, this side the golden shore, oh there, will be still sweeter than it ever was before.</i> Oh the joys that await the believer in Christ, who's eternal destiny is sure, for "precious in the sight of the Lord, is the death of His saints," oh so precious. <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Psa. 116:15)</span> Now that places a song in my heart and a spring in my step. Welcome spring! <br />
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<br />Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-57025101252917734082016-02-25T08:37:00.000-08:002016-03-05T15:26:59.247-08:00Good EnoughWhen I discovered that the opportunity for free ice climbing was happening the same weekend as our youth retreat, the realization began to sink in. God was providing a hands on illustration for the lessons we would be teaching. Because He's amazing like that.<br />
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All my life I've struggled with the idea that I must try and try to be a good Christian, for I thought that only then would God turn His face toward me in favor. Oh, I don't mean working for my salvation, (which comes only by faith in the work of Christ on the cross), but once saved, working to be an acceptable person according to the expectations of Scripture. The bar was raised high and through discipline and self-denial I aimed to reach it. However, striving for goodness is harder than it looks, much like climbing ice walls. <br />
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Some students clamored quickly to the top, determined to conquer. And so it is with life. The compliant or competitve personalities thrive under self-discipline. Goodness seems effortless. We dish out praise for a job well-done, when in reality, it is only a performance of natural strength.<br />
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Other students struggled. They couldn't quite figure out how to dig their toe into the ice or didn't have the strength to thrust the axe such that it would catch the frozen surface. And I thought about those students who resist being good. Their adventursome personality must always push the buttons and test the limits. Rules cause them to bristle and compliance is detestable. Is Christianity all about outward conformity to a set of rules which we have determined are good? I think not, and yet when we, as adults, hammer and pound for outward behavioral change, this is the message they often receive.<br />
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In reality, Christianity is about life in Christ, abundant and joyful. The heart is what matters, for authentic living flows only from the inside out. We can conform the outward person all we want, but until the heart is in the right place, outward conformity is temporary and results in either thinking less of ourselves in dejection, (failure), or more of ourselves in pride, (achievements). Our own image then becomes the primary focus, an emphasis on self, which cripples our ability to overcome and thrive in love toward one another.<br />
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However, at the change of the seasons, every bit of ice, all our own goodness, melts away and comes crashing down. And where does that leave us? At the foot of the cross, clinging only to our Savior, the bare rock on which we stand. His righteousness, not our own. Most assuredly, the blood of Jesus cleanses us from all sin, and when God looks at us, He sees, not our filth, but the holiness of Christ.<br />
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There comes a point in life when the weight of all those expectations pushes us under and we are left helpless. The realization that we can never work hard enough and never be good enough sinks into our being and we cry out to Jesus. He alone saves and sustains us. He alone gives the power to live free.<br />
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I am so very thankful that <b>in Christ</b>, there is freedom, not bondage. But this freedom comes only as I surrender to God's terms. I know, it sounds, once again, like rules. Yet, the difference lies in the attitude of my mind. No longer do I <b><i>strive to attain</i></b> a goodness which God will accept, but rather, I <b><i>align my will</i></b> to God's, and through obedience, work out in my practice what He has already worked into my heart. I live by His strength, not my own, for He Himself says,<b><i>"my yoke is easy and my burden is light."</i> </b> (<span style="font-size: x-small;">Matt. 11:30)</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><br /></span>Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-25500695030586335682016-02-16T14:41:00.000-08:002016-02-16T14:41:14.641-08:00Hearty BranchesI sheepishly raised my hand and looked around the room in disbelief. Was I really the only one among 35 women who had traits of the lion personality? As the leader went on to describe some of the not so desireable characteristics I wanted to crawl through a crack in the floor. Harsh. Direct. Was I really those things? <br />
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Most of the women fell in the nurturing golden retriever category, some among the fun loving otters, and the rest of them busy beavers. I found some solace in the fact that I also had strong beaver traits. Yet, as I thought about it, what could be more cold and uncaring than a lion/beaver combo? <br />
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I've always known that my nurturing was never high on the charts. If the kids scraped their knee or threw up in the night, it was usually my husband who came to their rescue, not me. He always did the doctoring and consoling for the family. And yet, over the last few years I've carried a deep desire to shepherd, to mentor and encourage, and so somewhere, there must be a smidget of golden retreiver in me. <br />
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Not long ago, I finished a study on the four gospels and one thing stood out to me. Whenever Jesus faced the crowds, He was moved with compassion. And I thought, "What is it that moves me?" It was then I realized how often I am moved with a critical spirit, or moved with fear, or even pride. How many times have I been motivated to set things right, but done so in a prickly, harsh, uncaring manner? <br />
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With Valentine's Day in our recent memory, I thought it appropriate to write about my phrase for the year, and that is this: <b><i>to be moved with compassion</i></b>. You may have noticed that this blog has been silent for a time. This is because my energies have been spent elsewhere, but that is not all. I felt some of my writing was sprinkled with judgment and carried a superior tone. I thought that I dare not write lest I say the wrong things.<br />
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When a large truck parked in front of my house, it broke off some of the branches to my tree. This branch sat on my yard all winter. It was bare, exposed, and unsightly. As I began to plan a Valentine Tea for our young girls, I needed an idea for table centerpieces. With a little help from pinterest, it came. I ran out to my yard and with great enthusiasm, snatched up that large branch, breaking off the smaller limbs. I set them in decorated canning jars and performed some hot glue magic. The transformation was amazing! Those branches, so cold and dismal, began to pop with color!<br />
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It was then that the spiritual picture began to unfold before my eyes. What I needed was not a change in my personality . . . but a change of heart.<br />
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I know you've heard the phrase, <i><b>'better to have tried and failed than to have never tried.'</b></i> It is so easy to let fear motivate our lives. But "perfect love casts out fear." <span style="font-size: x-small;">(1John 4:18)</span> And so I do not hide in a corner, but rather, venture out into the great unknown, seeking to honor God with my life, even if that means I must be vulnerable and risk failure. And this, all because of love.<br />
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I don't want to be annoying in the lives of others, a clanging gong or a crashing cymbal. Yet, if left to myself this is where I fall. And so this year my purpose, my goal, is to be moved with compassion, to let love motivate my thoughts, attitudes, and actions, to be a hearty branch plugged into the source of love, Jesus Himself.<br />
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And isn't that true for each of us? Every personality has its strengths and weaknesses. Yet, God made us on purpose with our own unique temperment. Our life in Christ is not meant to squelch our personalities, but rather meant to work together with others so we might contribute to the whole. In this way, we grow and become balanced. Blessing results. Culturally, some are more accepted than others, but in God's eyes, each has a purpose and comes down to this one base denominator--love for God and love for one another. <br />
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<i>"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal...And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." 1 Cor. 13:1,13</i>Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-55578765805107513982015-12-28T15:09:00.000-08:002015-12-28T15:09:35.607-08:00 A Firm Foundation<br />
Today I finally had a quiet moment to sit down and savor all your wonderful Christmas cards and letters. Thank you to all of you who still carry on that tradition. I thoroughly enjoy your family news and well wishes. However, as much as I enjoy sending out cards, this is the first time I've failed to get that task accomplished, and so this will have to do. <br />
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Last January, God pressed upon my heart this phrase, 'prepare the way for the Lord'. I can now look back and see God's faithfulness to carry it out. The hard ground of our hearts has been painfully plowed, the rough clods stirred up, broken and humbled, so that the presence of the Lord can be more evident in our lives. <br />
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For once upon a 2015 there were six little sheep belonging to the Shepherd. They looked tasty to a big bad wolf seeking whom he might devour. That wolf huffed and puffed but he could not blow the house down, for those sheep had built upon a sure foundation, anchored in Jesus Christ their Savior. When trouble came they ran pell mell to Jesus, who is not ashamed to call them brothers.<br />
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The year started on the mountain top with our annual youth winter retreat. There we learned about being salt and light in the world. But at the time of green grass and budding flowers the path plunged downward into a dark valley where shadows of shame loomed large. A crisis with a children's minstry, discovered the big bad wolf creeping down the chimney, totally unexpected. But he was met by the boiling pot of truth. <br />
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Later, I was tested in the orchard's of my lush Oregon stomping grounds where I visited my family. With my daughter Heather, we went on to attend my youngest brother's wedding in Seattle. The wolf was lurking in our travels but we hopped in the butter churn, our faith in action, and rolled all the way back home, safe and sound. <br />
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Not long after, my husband took the youth to the inner city of Chicago where the wolf sought to wreak havoc, but even there he could not break through, for our hope is fixed on the Shepherd. He remains faithful. <br />
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However, the big bad wolf was not easily deterred. He showed up again at the kitchen where my husband tore his rotatory cuff and found out that he has no cartilage in his shoulders. Because of the missing cartilage, the rotator cuff could not be repaired. Hence, pain medication was prescribed. And the pain medication led to an ulcer which threatened to take his life. <br />
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Yet, God has done more than we can ask or think in His great provision and healing. In the midst of these encounters with the wolf, we have been led to green pastures and been refreshed by the presence of our Shepherd. <br />
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In June we spent a glorious day at the sweet pea patch near a creek close to home. <br />
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We had a special time with Jeff's parents at our friend's luxerious cabin. <br />
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Jeff and I celebrated 25 years of marriage in our own beautiful mountains of the San Juans. Earlier in the year, (before the injury to his shoulder), we coached a volleyball team together. It was such a rich experience and good for our marriage as well. We still keep in touch with those kids.<br />
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Heather was chosen for her dream job at a children's hospital in Ohio, where she is finishing her senior year of college in nursing.<br />
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Tyler recently received a job in his field of computer science. After taking the fall semester off to work, he will be back to college in January. <br />
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Ivy is adjusting to high school while Summer is holding her own in 8th grade. <br />
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The year has certainly weathered our house, but it still stands, for no one, not even the big bad wolf, can snatch us from our Shepherd's hands. We are weary from all the huffing and puffing, but not dismayed, for our lives are hidden with Christ in God. We take shelter under the protection of His wings. <br />
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Christmas brings us full circle where we are enjoying the season with family and friends. Thank you for touching our lives, each in your own unique way. We are truly blessed beyond measure. <br />
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From our house to yours, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. <br />
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<br />Tylerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05629700522069359695noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-30530473537493587552015-12-14T12:44:00.000-08:002015-12-14T12:44:06.476-08:00Joyful and TriumphantEvery year at this time I crave meaning. The emphasis on things, the fluff, and clutter, even the indulgent foods, shout so loud that the Bread of Life, my real sustenance, can seem dimmed and hard to find. Yet, God always brings His presence to the forefront in unexpected ways. <br />
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At times God has brought sickness or injury to turn my attentions toward Him. Other times it is financial strain, a move, or even the death of someone close to me. While these life difficulties add stress to the season, at the same time, <b><i>I can look back and say they were a gift, for God made Himself known to me in ways I never imagined.</i> </b>He showed His faithfulness in the midst of them and brought me to the other side overflowing with His fullness . . . rich meaning. <br />
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These experiences enhance worship, taking it to a deeper level. Like the boy with his five loaves and two fish, I bring before the Lord what I have. I lay it out before Him. I present my worry, my sadness, my trial, and, miraculously, <i><b>He gives grace upon grace</b></i>. Yet, the process of laying my concerns at the feet of Jesus never comes without a wrestling match.<br />
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This year is no different. I'm fighting hard to align my will with God's. At first I resisted being forced to simplify, but now, in that simplicity, I'm finding great treasure. The deadlines rushing up to meet me, no longer matter. I can be at rest in the fact that Christmas cards won't be sent, there is no flurry of shopping, and no frantic cooking or endless decorating of cookies. Instead, there is great creativity in using the resources I already have around the house, and much delight in doing so. God is reminding me loud and clear that this world is not my home. <br />
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Yet, while I enjoy the creativity, I fight to keep my focus on eternal values because there is a constant pull towards the tangible expectations of how Christmas is supposed to look. The temptation to be short sighted is very real. And the lie lingers in my mind that I must be a bad parent if my children are disappointed. <br />
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However, as I'm choosing to fix my mind on Jesus, my eternal home is becoming more and more clear and I'm finding a joy which cannot be explained. I don't mean that I'm happy all the time. (My family can certainly attest to that!) In fact, the opposite is often the case. I've been grieving over the serious illness of my father-in-law and over a bondage that has captured a dear friend. But I'm learning and growing. I'm not the same person I was before. It may have taken my whole lifetime, but I think God is finally getting through to my thick skull, and that is this. <b>Where I choose to settle in my thoughts determines where I dwell in my living. </b><br />
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All this time, all those years, I never fully understood who I am in Christ. Oh, I knew it positionally, but allowed lies to crowd and clutter truth so that it could not always be worked out in my everyday practice of routine life. What a difference it makes that the Word became flesh and dwelt among us! This baby, the Christ child, changes everything. Because He lives, I live. Not a mere existence, nor a drudgery, or a dread of the future, but joyful and triumphant living! My circumstances do not matter, because meaning is not found there. It is found only in a relationship with Jesus, the anchor for my soul. This Christmas, I sink deep into His embrace. O the wonders of His love! <br />
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<i>O come, all ye faithful,</i><br />
<b><i>joyful and triumphant,</i></b><br />
<i>O come ye, O come ye to Bethlehem,</i><br />
<i>Come and behold Him,</i><br />
<i>Born the King of angels,</i><br />
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<i>O come let us adore Him</i><br />
<i>O come let us adore Him</i><br />
<i>O come let us adore Him</i><br />
<i>Christ the Lord.</i><br />
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Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-43882073619493692972015-12-02T11:04:00.000-08:002015-12-02T11:04:11.960-08:00Beautiful FeetWaves threaten to capsize the boat, and He sleeps? The danger is real. The circumstances urgent. Likewise, the countdown to Christmas and the pressure to deliver has already begun with its contracting expectations. The strain is real and the pressure urgent. Ready or not, the 25th will come. But this year is different . . . because of shoes, the shoes of peace. <br />
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I love the sparkly snow clad Christmas cards, the scenes of tranquility and the nostalgia of warm family happiness, but this kind of peace seems a dream, an ideal which eludes us all. In reality, I need a peace that can stand in the misdst of turmoil, stress, deadlines, busyness, and noise.<br />
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This year, perhaps more than others, I have reason to be unsettled. Torents have beaten violently against my house. Between the failing health of my in-laws, my husband's recovery, and my children's growing pains, I enter some ominous territory I've never seen before. The forecast brings monumental waves which would seem to be anything but peaceful.<br />
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Yet, as I enter this hoilday season, I'm finding a new understanding of the word peace, that it's found only in the anchor of my relationship with God. Rather than a perfect setting with well behaved people, perfect gifts, and warm fuzzy feelings, I look to my standing in Christ. I am accepted before God, not on whether I meet the image of a perfect holiday, but on the basis of His righteousness and His perfection. That never changes. Ever. This peace with God provides a launching pad for peace with others, the peace of God which transcends all understanding. <br />
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Last year at this time I did not fare so well when it came to peace. I allowed my circumstances to absorb my attentions. I was so overwhelmed that they became all consuming. I'm sorry to say I was rather prickly and disagreeable. I entered the season lacking shoes of peace.<br />
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Yet, I learned something from those experiences, that peace is not passive. Instead, I have to actively pursue it by focusing on the greatness of my Creator. Does God really reign? Is He truly in control of my life? Can He tangibly provide for my needs? Of course He can! But so often I don't live by what I say. Peace comes as I live with the awareness that <b>God. Is. Big.</b> He's got this! Every bit of it! Therefore, I can live settled, quiet, and peaceful, because I trust the One who rules my life. <br />
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With this perspective, I enter the season having my shoes of peace laced and ready to move forward. My heart overflows with gratefulness, for I was once the object of God's wrath, but now, because of the blood of Jesus, I am the object of His great love. He sent the perfect gift, wrapped in swaddling clothes and lying in a manger. No wonder the angels sang, "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men on whom His favor rests." <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Lk. 2:14)</span><br />
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Christmas baking? A clean house? Perfect pictures? A beautiful tree? Lushious meals? Exact gift? Some of this might remain undone, but it doesn't matter. The pressure is off. The reason? I have what really matters, my life in Christ, and no amount of turmoil can change that. <br />
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Both my dad and my father-in-law have commented on my square feet. They are not very pretty by the world's standards, but God says, "How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of him who brings good news, who publishes peace, who brings good news of happiness, who publishes salvation, who says to Zion,<b> </b><br />
<b>'Your God reigns'</b> ". <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Isa. 52:7)</span> Yes! Turns out, I have beautiful feet afterall, for they are engulfed in the shoes of peace. <br />
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Ignorance is <b>not</b> bliss! When I forget who I am in Christ and do not realize the overwhelming fullness of the gift of Christmas, I become ungrateful and unsettled. I worry about many things. However, to <b>know</b> this great work of God and His involvement in my life provides a rich foundation because I "stand firm...with my feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace." <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Eph. 6:15)</span> Therefore, I can sing this song with confidence.<br />
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<i>Higher than the mountains that I face</i><br />
<i>Stronger than the power of the grave</i><br />
<i>Constant through the trial and the change</i><br />
<i>One thing remains.</i><br />
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<i>God's love never fails, never runs dry, never runs out on me,</i><br />
<i>On and on and on and on it goes</i><br />
<i>It overwhelms and satisfies my soul </i><br />
<i>And I never ever have to be afraid,</i><br />
<i>For God's love remains. </i><br />
<i><span style="font-size: xx-small;">(by Kristian Stanfill)</span></i><br />
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<i><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span></i>Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-40409582193791584772015-11-24T17:36:00.000-08:002015-11-24T20:00:42.663-08:00A Sacrifice of PraiseAs the season of giving thanks is upon us, I cannot remain silent, for my eyes have seen a great work of God. Yet, it is nothing like I expected. In fact, this year could be summed up in one word--injury. However, in the midst of hurt, God remains faithful. I cling to Him as my refuge and strength.<br />
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Last spring I experienced a setback in a ministry that was close to my heart. The very people I was trying to reach, lashed out in hate, causing my presence among them to end abruptly. I was wounded in my spirit, and, though outwardly I tried to carry on, inwardly I was bleeding to death. My heart wilted and I grew faint with discouragement, thinking I could never be useful to God again.<br />
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However, God reminded me over and over through Scripture and song that His love never fails and His mercies are new every morning. My accusers had no ground on which to stand, because my life is hidden with Christ in God, and the blood of Jesus declares me righteous. Yet, never in my wildest imaginations, did I realize that God was about to give me a vivid real life illustration of His great work on the cross to heal my heart. <br />
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It was Aug. 1st, my husband's birthday, when he awoke to profuse bleeding. As the morning wore on, his condition became an emergency. But once at the hospital the bleeding stopped and we were sent home. I felt foolish for bringing him in. Yet, the next two days at home were sober, for the bleeding started up again and he could scarcely crawl without fainting. We took him back to the doctor who stared in disbelief, for my husband had no standing pulse. He was then sent immediately to the hospital where we learned he had a stomach ulcer. <br />
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I watched as the nurses set up equipment to give him blood. But it could not be given in one big whoosh. Rather, we waited...and waited...and waited, while 3 units of blood were infused into his body, one. drop. at. a. time. I began to see his energy gradually return. By the time we left the hospital two days later, my husband was his usual upbeat self. Weak, yes, but the blood continued to circulate through his body bringing healing in its time.<br />
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It was in the quiet of that hospital room, during the patient waiting on the blood to be transferred into his body, that this message came to me. <i><b>"Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord, will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."</b></i> Isa. 40:30-31<br />
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The visual of the blood hanging in its plastic case, caused me to see that I needed a blood transfusion from my Heavenly Father! I needed His blood to heal my spiritual wound. <b>Yet, this life giving blood required that I wait on the Lord. </b> Yes, I had His life at my initial salvation, where, at nine years old, I placed my faith in Jesus as my Savior. But the death of Jesus on the cross to pay for my sin runs even deeper than that. It also means that His very life is infused into mine <b>daily</b>. Because He rose from the dead, I live. Not simply breathing oxygen, but real, vibrant, soulful, abundant life!<br />
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The injury, of which I spoke above, had zapped my strength, even the will to lift my head, for I was filled with shame. I could scarcely walk my Christian life without fainting, let alone think about soaring like an eagle. But as I looked only unto the Lord, and cried out to Him with my pathetic heart, He delivered hope to my soul.<br />
One. Drop. At. A. Time. <br />
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This Thanksgiving, I can honestly say that I am thankful for these experiences. Though they brought great pain and came at great expense, God revealed Himself to me in a deeper way, a personal, tender, year long drawing of my heart into the ocean of His great love. He is my shield and the lifter of my head. My heart now understands the value of faith in the waiting and has seen the healing result. <br />
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The fall season, (pun intended), has brought great fruitfulness in my life. Through the brokeness, God has launched me into areas of ministry that are beyond what I could have imagined. He has fine tuned my listening so that I have a sharper recognition of His voice. I seek to follow His lead, His agenda, not my own. And last, but not least, He has confirmed that He is not done with me yet, for His blood covers a multitude of sins. What was meant for evil, God used for good. My fainting heart has been strengthened to soar, and I am truly thankful. <br />
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May I never lose the wonder, the wonder of the cross. <br />
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<i>"He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. </i><br />
<i>The Lord delights in those who fear Him, </i><br />
<i>who put their hope in his unfailing love." </i><br />
Psalm 147:3,11<br />
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<br />Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-91458776283131792182015-10-27T17:58:00.000-07:002015-10-27T17:58:03.425-07:00What I CherishA week has passed since our eventful day, but this is the first chance I've had to write about it. I was caught by surprise as my husband stole me away for several days to celebrate our 25 years of marriage. <br />
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I love the off season when everything, even nature, breathes a sigh and rests. In a town normally filled with hoards of tourists and no place to park, we discovered, instead, real people . . . school children and laborers, mountain natives and grandparents with their little tikes. At one point we found a fly fisherman practicing his cast while his dog retrieved the flying objects. Somehow, the town drew me in with its intimacy. <br />
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Likewise, as we hiked through the aspen forests, most on the tail end of their glory, I felt the hushed nearness of their leaves under my feet. And the fragrance, oh my! There is nothing quite like the scent of fall in the aspens. All of nature settles in for their deep sleep of winter, anticipating their rest . . . gloriously content. <br />
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Then we came upon, this.<br />
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Appropriately named, Bridal Veil Falls.<br />
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The pool could not be seen from the road. Only those diligent enough to hike up the hill found the treasure.<br />
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I am reminded of the beauty of marriage, the covenant we share before God, and its exclusiveness. One man and one woman, joined together to form a new family unit, a picture of the relationship between Christ and His people. <br />
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This anniversary we did something we've never done before--attend a marriage conference. Though risky in the sense that I was not sure what would be required, the rewards far outweighed the fears. I came away from that conference with one word . . . 'cherish'. <br />
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It's easy to joke about what went wrong at the wedding ceremony, or to make fun of the style and design at that time. And in my case, I bemoan the lack of a professional photographer which left me with few quality pictures. But, when all is said and done, it really doesn't matter. All of that is only fluff and oh so trivial compared to the rich and rewarding treasure I have in my marriage. I don't want to forget what I have for lack of a perfect photograph. <br />
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I cherish the covenant we made before God, because it is the marriage that truly matters, not the wedding celebration and whether everything was in place. The beauty comes in its committment and exclusiveness, in its boundaries, for a "cord of three strands is not easily broken." (Eccles.4:12)<br />
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My husband and I have something special, sacred, and holy. And like the awe and hush of nature in its rest, there is a contentment which comes from the Lord in the wear and tear of years that cannot be compared. <br />
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Recently, as I took some unique pictures of our rings, I noticed something. They have scratches, nicks, and dings, obviously well worn and seasoned. But they still matter in that they represent our marriage covenant. Like any couple, we too have experienced conflict and trials, heartbreak and disappointment, but God has preserved our lives and kept us only unto Him and for each other. Our marriage was founded on Christ as our Solid Rock and continues to do so, providing great stability.<br />
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If I had it to do over again, I would still marry this same man. He is one of the most selfless, capable, and understanding persons I know. He loves God deeply and is passionate about living in a way that honors His Lord. However, we are not the same people we were when we got married. And this is by God's design. <br />
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When left to ourselves we miss the checks and balances of relationship and can easily fall into extremes. If we are not in fellowship with other believers, it is easy to miss our own blind spots. And marriage, being the closest of relationships, does this the best. I, for one, would have been steeped in miserable legalism were it not for my husband who lives so free. I love that about him, that he knows such joy and confidence in the Lord. I shudder to think where I would be today if God had not brought him into my life to turn me away from extremes, and to provide perspective that is broader than it would be on my own. <br />
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I cherish my husband who is truly a gift from God. I cherish the covenant we made before God, and recognize that it is binding, a serious matter, and not to be taken lightly. I cherish our rings, a symbol of our promise. I cherish our four children and the way they have enriched our lives. I cherish those tiny ones known only from the dark of the womb, who precede us in heaven. And when I think of all we've gone through together, I cherish our marriage of 25 years. Last, but not least, I cherish our parents, our heritage, where they have both now celebrated 50 years of marriage. What a treasure! I look forward to the day when we can offer the same to our children. <br />
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<i>"Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. </i><br />
<i>Your people will be my people and your God my God." Ruth 1:16b</i><br />
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<br />Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-23837678677292154842015-10-17T07:10:00.000-07:002015-10-17T07:10:06.270-07:00Heart CheckLast weekend my family drove out to the desert and caught the tail end of the airshow. As the jets flew overhead I couldn't help but wonder, w<i>hat elite sort of person flies a Thunderbird? </i> I knew that it could not be easy, for if it were, everyone would be flying them. These pilots had my respect because I was certain they were familiar with disciplined concentration and hard work.<br />
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Now, a week later, as I'm preparing to play songs for worship, my thoughts keep returning back to these words:<br />
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There's nothing worth more, that will ever come close<br />
No thing can compare . . .Your Presence, Lord.<br />
<span style="font-size: xx-small;">(by Bryan Torwalt and Katie Torwalt)</span><br />
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And I thought, <i>do I really, truly crave the Presence of God to that degree?</i> If there is nothing comparable to the presence of God in my life, then what action am I taking to be drawn into Him? I can pray more fervently, worship more intensely, and seek more diligently. I can sacrifice my all or hush my heart, but in truth, more of His presence boils down to one thing: simple obedience. If I want to know more of God's presence in my life I have to live by His terms. <br />
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Those F-16 pilots may have flown proud that day, but in order to arrive at that place, they had to be teachable. Resisting instruction from a commander would have been disastrous, not only to them, but to many others as well. In order to know such precision and glory, they had to fly by the rules.<br />
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Yes, I want more of God's presence in my life, but I will not arrive there by singing a meaningful song. In fact, if my life has become self-indulgent and disobedient, my heart becomes sluggish and insensitive to the voice of God . . . . hardened. <br />
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Often God means to bless and draw me into intimacy with Him but I miss it because my heart is not in the right place to receive it. I've become very aware of this in recent days as I've noted the response of those hearing the Word of God. Like the parable of the farmer, some receive the Word thinking they've already arrived. Others accept it with great gladness but then as the week progresses, lose interest. Some actively resist. It is only those whose hearts are softened, yes, even broken, that the Word takes root and grows. <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Matt. 13:3-9)</span><br />
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We were made for righteousness. Therefore, in obedience is where we find the greatest joy, the highest freedom. "Be holy as I [Jesus] am holy," we are instructed. <span style="font-size: x-small;">(1 Pet. 1:16)</span> It seems an unrealistic command, and yet, by the power of God's Holy Spirit dwelling within us, we can defy gravity . . . this pull of sin on our lives. Soaring is possible. <br />
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Yes, I want to be more aware of God's goodness in my life, more aware of His presence. Only yesterday I saw Him pour out an unexpected blessing on my family. But I might not have recognized it as that, if I had not been acting in obedience to Him. Living by God's terms has many motivators, but one of the greatest rewards is that it draws us into His presence. For this reason, I "prepare my mind for action; remain self-controled and set my hope fully on the grace to be given me..." <span style="font-size: x-small;">(1 Pet. 1:13)</span><br />
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<i>"With what shall I come before the LORD? </i><br />
<i>Will [He] be pleased with thousands of rams, </i><br />
<i>with ten thousand rivers of oil? </i><br />
<i>He has showed you, O man, what is good. </i><br />
<i>And what does the LORD require of you? </i><br />
<i>To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God." </i><span style="font-size: x-small;">(Micah 6:5,7,8)</span><br />
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<br />Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-68310173477326530202015-10-13T07:01:00.000-07:002015-10-13T07:01:49.042-07:00Well PreservedI was about to speak before a group of unknown women when the lady sitting behind me found out I had a son of 23 years. She leans forward and whispers in my ear, "You are well preserved, my friend, well-preserved." I've been described in many ways but have never heard that one before! Needless to say, it tickled my funny bone. <br />
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Having just gone through the canning season where every manner of produce is put up and preserved for the winter, I got to thinking on that thought even more. The process of canning food consists of many things, but perhaps most importantly, sealing food within a jar holds back spoilage or decay. <br />
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There is coming a day, perhaps very soon, when the LORD "will gather the lame...assemble the exiles and those [He] has brought to grief. [He] will make the lame a remnant, those driven away a strong nation." (<span style="font-size: x-small;">Micah 4:6-7</span>) I am encouraged to think that God preserves those who are His, keeping us for that day when we will dwell with Him in the heavenlies. Although, contrary to the rules of canning, He does not choose the perfect. Instead, He chooses the lame, the weak, and the outcast. <br />
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Last week my children were off school for fall break, but nothing went as planned. We met one disappointment after another, from sickness to conflict to frustration to a funeral. The week seemed a smorgasborg of trials and I found my heart becoming angry and bitter with the unfairness of it all. But by the end of the week I realized I'd been fighting . . . resisting what God was bringing my way. My hope had been in my expectations rather than in the Lord. <br />
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When at last we made it to Sunday, my focus was drawn to Naomi from the book of Ruth, and her long journey to Moab, away from the land of blessing. Yet, years later, she took the road that would lead her back to Bethlehem, back to obedience and fellowship with God. El-Shaddai, her Great Provider, had dealt with her for the purpose of <i><b>preserving</b></i> her as His own. <br />
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I am so glad that God preserves me through my trials and my wanderings. He not only creates and redeems, but He <i><b>sustains</b></i>. Seasons change. Circumstances are unreliable. People let us down. But God is my strong tower, the One who holds back the decay in my life and the tendency towards evil, because I am <i><b>sealed</b></i> as His own. <br />
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This gives me great hope as I pray for others as well, those who are struggling to find their way and who have settled in a land of rebellion or disobedience. I know that God has the power to<i><b> turn their hearts back home</b></i>, back to the land of blessing, for He has preserved them in His grace and love. I can pray a prayer of faith rather than worry for He is trustworthy. <br />
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Well-preserved? By all means! I am held secure in Christ, and nothing can shake that fact. <br />
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<i>"Now it is God who makes both us and you stand firm in Christ. </i><br />
<i>He anointed us, </i><i>set his seal of ownership on us, </i><br />
<i>and put his Spirit in our hearts as a deposit, </i><br />
<i>guaranteeing what is to come." </i><br />
<i>2 Cor. 1:21-22</i><br />
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<br />Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-4560302324129099532015-07-01T09:19:00.000-07:002015-07-01T09:19:40.655-07:00Fall ApartWould you follow your friend over a cliff? Obviously not, but God is different. Because His ways are higher than ours and His thoughts beyond ours, He sometimes leads us to follow Him right over the e<br />
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Like a mountain stream, our lives meander through the ordinary or rush through the busy, always moving towards the lowland where it is safe. But God would take us beyond safe, even free falling out of control. Life pushes hard and every once in awhile I find myself plunging over the precipice, <br />
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Maybe you know it too, this feeling of arms flailing and legs floundering, heart caught in your throat, the point of no return. But I'm learning that this is a good place to be, fragmented and undone.<br />
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When I walked into my church and saw the decorations for VBS, I knew, without doubt, what the message held for me. That was two weeks ago. The decor has since come down, but God's work in my life remains. In fact, my heart is so full I can scarcely take it all in, let alone try to communicate it. Yet, I'm compelled to try. <br />
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Like water that rushes down from the snow packed peaks, my life is on a journey. Most often I would like it to be predictable, careful, and familiar. But every now and then God brings me to the falls. This is not only life's circumstances that I cannot control, but also choosing to risk the difficult, doing the hard thing, in order to promote personal growth. <br />
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We each live and move in areas where we feel safe. But what would happen if we actively chose to venture out beyond those boundaries? What if God directed our steps in a direction we've never been before? Would we follow? It causes our knees to shake and our lips to tremble. Our hearts grip with fear as we frantically reach for anything stable. But God removes all handholds and there is no where to go but down, sinking deep into risk and great humility. <br />
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Is God mean to send us catapulting over the falls? Never! Rather, it is His deep passion for our growth that motivates Him. He desires only good for our lives and does not want us to remain immature as infants. It is His graciousness that takes us to a greater sphere of influence, bringing us to new ground. Most of all, He wants to reveal Himself to us. "Show us Your glory!" we cry out. This is one way He displays His majesty. Will we accept it? <br />
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Time seems to hold still as droplets hang in the air. The water f a l l s a p a r t , separating into tiny particles. At the bottom are boulders ready to pierce the torrent and the resulting collision is deafening. Like that noise, so our trials can seem overwhelming and we hear nothing else. Yet, this constant pounding produces deep pools at the base of the falls. It is from these depths of grace, that the river rushes on to new territory, for God "opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble. Submit yourselves, then, to God." <span style="font-size: x-small;"> (James 4:6-7)</span> <br />
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So why is it, that the common stream does not catch our eye like the falls? Why is it that the waterfall receives so much attention? The creek is nothing, not given a second thought . . . until it starts to fall. Then it becomes glorious. <br />
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Likewise, in our weakness, in our f a l l i n g a p a r t , the glory of God is revealed. For this reason, "I consider it pure joy when I face trials of many kinds, because I know that the testing of my faith develops perseverance." <span style="font-size: x-small;">(James 1:3)</span> <br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Note the arms of exuberant triumph on the bridge</td></tr>
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Faith is tested in the flailing that occurs over the edge. It is there that trust is real and I can truly lean on my Savior's everlasting arms. He remains faithful, for at the base of the falls, in the midst of all that churning and spray, the waters come back together and continue on their trek.<br />
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God will never forsake His own. He might bring us through severe discipline, cause us to reap consequences for our sin, or simply want to build our character, but through all of this, He will not let us go. These trials are not brought into my life to push me away from God, but rather to draw me ever closer, and so I accept what God brings. He seeks my good and His honor. <br />
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Journey off the map? For sure! I want to go places I've never been before so I might become more acutely aware of God's presence and know the strength of His right hand. Most of all, I want to see His glory! Though the way is unknown to me, it is certainly known to Him. I can trust Him. <br />
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<i>On Christ the solid Rock I stand,</i><br />
<i>All other ground is sinking sand. </i><br />
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<i>His oath, His covenant, His blood,</i><br />
<i>support me in the whelming flood,</i><br />
<i>When all around my soul gives way</i><br />
<i>He then is all my hope and stay.</i><br />
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<br /><br />Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-14746768794140854982015-06-18T11:36:00.000-07:002015-06-18T11:36:37.917-07:00The WalkThe statement seems obvious. "This is the way, walk in it." <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Isa. 30:21) </span> Duh! Of course, if I know the way, I will not hesitate to go there. But I forget about a third factor . . . the constant pull toward my own desire. <br />
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As long as I can remember, there has been a big hype about finding the will of God. If only we knew, we would follow! Oh what excruciating efforts we put into the knowing! Yet, so often, it is not more knowledge I need, <b><i>only surrender acted out in obedience</i></b>. Why do I think that having information in my head equals a grasping of the concept? Certainly, knowledge is a starting point, but that's as far as it goes. In order for God's Word and way to become a reality in my life, I have to live it. <br />
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When I found out that our theme verse for Vacation Bible School was, "This is the way, walk in it", my heart skipped a beat. Conflict of circumstances had already substantiated the fact that I could not teach one of the classes. However, I knew that somehow I <b>had</b> to be there because I felt these concepts were meant, not just for the children, but for me. I did not want to miss hearing God's voice. And so I volunteered to be one of the photographers. Doing so gave me a perspective I would not have gained had I taught the lessons. <br />
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The reason this theme was so attractive to me is because it is the current story of my life. All last year God instilled on my heart these words from Joshua 24:15, "Choose you this day whom you will serve." The choices I make daily determine whether I know life or death, victory or defeat. I'm not talking about oxygen or lack of it, but of true, joyful, abundant life in Christ. <br />
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My kids thought I was insane when they woke one morning to these notes taped on my fridge and all over my kitchen cupboards. Each note said the same thing in big bold letters, "Choose Life!" It helped me gain control over my emotional eating. I've since taken those reminders down off the walls, but the concept has spread beyond my physical health to deeper battles in my life.<br />
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Only yesterday I made a choice that sabotaged my day, catapulting me into a downward spiral of depression. I know my weakness but I yielded to it anyway. The power is not in the knowing, but in complete surrender to Jesus. Resistance to His will is what pushed me off the path. <br />
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All of us can display determined will power for a time. I'm not talking about that, because there comes a point where will power fails us. In fact, anything that comes of our own strength will ultimately let us down. "Walk in it" can only come about through the power of Christ in me. <br />
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I find the walking part of the phrase peculiar. Not run, skip, or reach . . . just walk. There is a consistent daily factor to walking that sticks to the path for the long haul. Likewise, in my relationship with God there must be a consistent obedience for me to grasp the abundant life He offers. <br />
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That said, I'm off to do my 'walking', embracing God's agenda for the day, rather than my own. <br />
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Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-87378742443675017922015-06-16T19:03:00.000-07:002015-06-16T19:03:50.443-07:00Jars of ClayWe each have our passion. For some it is organization. For others, music or sports, mentoring or constructing. You fill in the blank. But one thing is evident. When we rest from that one thing which drives us, we discover our heart's true calling. <br />
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Though to an outsider it may seem that I've been coasting in summer time bliss, deep down it has been a struggle. When God directs me to pull back for a season and rest, I flounder. It seems so out of place, so odd. Most of all, it causes me to realize that my identity belongs, not in what I do, but in Christ. In this place of vulnerability, I am pulled into a deeper wonder of God's grace and a greater dependence on Him. <br />
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Trust is not always in more doing. There is nothing noble about working ourselves into the ground. Why are we made to feel guilt for setting limits and saying no? Life holds many seasons and right now, mine seems to be that of waiting. Yet, as my entire church rallies around a large scale VBS, I find my heart aching to teach. However, due to various circumstances, this was not my year to do so. <br />
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I am so uplifted when I teach. I love how the lessons grip me personally and cause me to worship with a greater intensity. And yet, how easy to hog that for myself, never allowing others the opportunity. To pull back now and then is a win win situation because others are given the chance to receive that blessing as well. But there is a deeper pain than being set on the shelf, that is, coming to believe that you have been disqualified from ever practicing your gift. <br />
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Several months ago I encountered a conflict which threatened to derail my passion for teaching, causing me to lose all confidence. I know, it is God, not me, who works through me to accomplish His purpose. Yet, I was petrified because of an attack on my integrity, causing me to live in false guilt and overwhelming shame. How can I carry on if what I am wired to do is squelched? If this is my spiritual gift, (and I believe it might be), then what is my purpose without it? I thought I might wilt. But some interesting creatures have recently crossed my path to help me gain perspective. <br />
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Sunday night, my family ventured out on an exploratory hike. There we met some wildlife, which, at the time were quite entertaining. Now I'm realizing they were a gift from God's hand, for these animals provided the picture I needed for the last few months to make sense. It was an "aha" moment.<br />
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A kangaroo mouse scurried across our path. We followed it because we found it peculiar, those long legs on its hind quarters looking like a kangaroo's, plus it had a strange tail. But we were surprised to find that as we approached, it did not move. Finally, we came so near that my daughter nudged it with her foot. It tipped over a little, stiff as a board, as if it were a bobble toy, and then sat upright again. It was obviously paralyzed with fear. No wonder these small creatures often become a snake's dinner! <br />
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Likewise, in my own life, my fear was causing me to be 'food for snakes'. I was embracing defeat like that mouse, stopped dead in my ministry, thinking I could never teach again. I assumed my purpose was thwarted. But now I realize that the enemy sought to use this situation to destroy me and hinder God's work.<br />
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However, we also met another creature. Coming around a bend we came upon a mountain sheep, all stately in his curly horns.<br />
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He stood there for quite some time, completely still. He watched us hike toward him, scarcely moving an eyeball. When we began to venture too close for comfort, he proudly sauntered away. <br />
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This sheep reminds me that there are times when God would have me pull away from intense ministry and be still. He commands me, in fact, to rest. But not in paralyzing fear. Rather, God would have me simply be still and know that He is God. And sometimes that stillness is brought about by a perceived failure. <br />
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The contrast was striking. Such confidence and assurance were displayed by the big horn sheep! That is the kind of stillness I desire. One that keeps its dignity intact and refuses to let a snake intimidate, or worse yet, eat it. I may have been derailed, but I know the character of my God. He will not let me be destroyed. More than that, He will restore and "cause all things to work together for good to those who love [Him]." <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Rom. 8:28)</span> God is for me. He is not against me. Ever. <br />
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I will trust Him in the silence. <br />
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<i>"But we have this treasure</i><br />
<i> in jars of clay</i><br />
<i>to show us that this all-surpassing power</i><br />
<i>is from God and not from us."</i><br />
<i>2 Cor. 4:7 </i><br />
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Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-53653604994998933122015-06-12T08:55:00.000-07:002015-06-12T08:55:25.852-07:00Freedom's ParadoxI feel as though I'm walking in a dream. After a whirlwind three weeks with my oldest daughter, she has now returned to Ohio where I will not see her again for some time. I'm thankful she made it okay, driving alone to the other side of the country. But now I feel somewhat dazed wondering, what just happened? But one thing I do know. She challenged me to embrace freedom.<br />
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Before she left, I was rushing to finish reading a book of hers, <i>The Discipline of Grace</i> by Jerry Bridges. She will be using it as a launching pad to teach the student leaders of Bible study discipleship classes at her school. I was intrigued by the book because it addresses a struggle I've been going through in my own life. <br />
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Last year I finally realized that God's strength in my weakness does not mean I do nothing. Actually, I knew that before, but it finally sunk through in my practical living. All my life I've been taught to surrender to God and watch Him work. While true, it is only one wing on the plane. The other wing consists of my obedience through action, yes, simply put, my doing . . . discipline. Herein lies the paradox. While relying on God's strength, I move. <br />
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However, it is easy to fall into the thought that 'my' discipline places me in greater favor with God, when, in fact, God is not impressed. My only merit before Him is His own grace lavished on me. This is His stamp of approval, nothing else. <br />
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I've been weighed down with made up rules, otherwise known as legalism. I've had experience at being both the offended and the offender. Yet, one thing is true for both; all the fussing is exhausting and becomes a spring board for pride. Many of the rules we make up are to accommodate what is most comfortable for us, our preferences rather than God's standard. Is it really a hill to die on? <b> Is love not the better goal?</b> <br />
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Walking through a canyon at dusk we found all these little creatures. I'm not kidding you, the frogs' croaks literally sounded like goats bleating. What a noise they made, their voices echoing off stone walls and across still ponds! And as it got dark, they became even louder. <br />
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Such a racket from such small creatures! Much like us. I long to rise above the squabbles and simply worship God with wholehearted devotion.<br />
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The last few weeks I have been everywhere. To the mighty Pacific, across vast deserts, and near tallest mountains. Seeing and experiencing these sights has opened my eyes to the grandeur and splendor of my Creator. How can I dawdle in mud holes of my own agenda and lists of what's proper when there is all this!<br />
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The God who made and sustains all creation calls me His own! I am His and nothing I do or do not do will change the fact that He loves me. My life might seem in the shadows or on the shelf, but that does not mean He has forgotten or withheld good from me. <br />
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Once His, I am always held by grace. How could I ever murmur or complain? This calls for worship! <br />
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As I've been reading through the book of Jeremiah, I've seen Babylon in a different light. Not only as a nation which was used by God to discipline His people, but as a picture of my own resistance. God has been asking me, "What is your Babylon?" <br />
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I've seen some areas of my life that are the discipline of God and I have been fighting against it rather than embracing and living among it, yes, even settling there. I'm learning that though something is not my preference or even my conviction, God would have me humbled and simply submit to what He brings into my life. In a word . . . love. <br />
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Love and obedience is what God requires. <b> I cannot make up my own rules to fit my disciplines so I might feel closer to God.</b> Furthermore, when I fail, when I disobey, God still loves just as tenaciously. It's a hard concept for me to really grasp. <br />
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Then why obey? Why go to the trouble of loving others? Because righteousness is the best place for me. The greatest joy is found in surrender to God and what He brings into my life. And perhaps the pat answer despised by children is reason enough. Because God said so. <br />
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I plan to buy this book of Heather's that I recently rushed through. I want to have my own copy to mark and read at a slower pace. Most of all, I want to live in Christ where I am free of legalism and yet, thriving in true holiness. <br />
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<br />Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-36126057177456174122015-05-26T09:05:00.000-07:002015-05-26T09:05:41.037-07:00Sheep and StreetsI awoke, not to the call of an alarm clock, but to the bleating of lambs. They were what my sister-in-law called 'bums', lambs being weaned from milk to grain. The cry was pathetic, urgent, authentic. And in that moment my heart surrendered to what lay ahead.<br />
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It was like God was saying to me, "Stop begging for milk. Accept what I bring and just chew the grain, because it will cause you to grow. Where is your faith?" <br />
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Only the day before, I had ventured out on a journey to my brother's wedding having a vacation mentality. Surely, after the events of the past month, I deserved a break. With only my college daughter for company, I expected to do whatever we wanted. This would be a trip bathed in comfort. <br />
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So when we received a phone call only minutes away from Boise, I did not receive it well. My daughter's best friend from college was flying to Alaska and had a 24 hour layover in Seattle. It happened to be on the very day we planned to be there. Could we meet for lunch?<br />
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Normally, I would jump at the chance, but I had already planned my route in order to avoid driving through the city. Truth be told, I was terrified of city driving and now I would be required to drive smack dab through the middle of it. Furthermore, I would need to find a parking place downtown in the city center. <br />
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All the way from Boise to eastern Oregon, I resisted and fussed. Why did our trip have to be sabotaged with this stress and discomfort? While I wanted to meet her friend, I didn't want the sacrifice to make it happen. Finally, I told my daughter no, justifying my decision on the basis of not needing to please people. It was okay to have boundaries. But whenever our playlist arrived at this song, I felt God's conviction.<br />
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<i>Let my life be the proof,</i><br />
<i>The proof of your love</i><br />
<i>Let my love look like You and what You're made of</i><br />
<i>How you lived, how You died</i><br />
<i>Love is sacrifice...</i><br />
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<i>If I sing but don't have love...</i><br />
<i>I leave a bitter taste with every word I say... </i><br />
<i> </i><span style="font-size: x-small;">(Lyrics by For King and Country)</span><br />
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I had made my decision on my own comfort and <b>on what was easiest for me.</b> As I pondered these things, God began to unmask my total selfishness. This trip was not about me, but about ministering to others. Here was an opportunity to live by faith rather than fear, to know God's sufficiency in my weakness, to demonstrate love for my daughter, and to practice what I preach.<br />
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Enter . . . the lamb's cry. <i>Okay, God, I surrender to Your way, but I'm desperate for Your enabling. I cannot do this on my own. Prepare the way. Go before me. </i><br />
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The day was beautiful. (And that's saying something for Seattle!) We were wowed and awed by the grandeur of the city, but most of all by God's sufficiency. There was no long wait in traffic, but rather, we sailed right through, taking only one wrong turn. But with Heather's friend and her mom both in the car with us, it was a silly girlfriend adventure and we got right back on track.<br />
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God showed Himself strong on my behalf, providing more than I had asked for in friendship and fun.<br />
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After a delicious lunch in a French bakery we said goodbye to our friends and I faced my next challenge--riding on a ferry across the bay. Though excited, I was also afraid, for it was something I had never done before. Again, God came through and wowed us with His glory.<br />
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Of course, we had to ride at the front with the wind in our faces and the view spectacular, ranking the day right up there with some of the best in my life! I was so glad that I did not let fear determine the course of the day! Yes, there were times I was afraid, but faith moves forward, even with trembling, and as a result, Seattle became "our new favorite city".<br />
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God used this experience to make me stronger, for when it was time to return home, we left later than planned and hit Portland in the middle of evening rush hour. Normally this would cause great panic, but I had "the peace that passes all understanding." I knew that all I had to do was follow the road (and the signs) and God would bring me to the other side. I figured if He could get me through Seattle, surely, He could handle Portland as well. <br />
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I recently received a marker which I keep in my Bible. It has lambs lined up eating grass in the pasture. Somehow, after all of this, it holds deeper meaning for me. I treasure its significance as a reminder that when I am afraid, I can cry out to Jesus. He never fails to come through for me and is my constant companion.<br />
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Next challenge? Chicago! I can't wait! <br />
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p.s. Thank you, Heather's friend and friend's mom, for providing such a day for me! Loved it!<br />
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<br />Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-77532975240027712682015-05-15T14:21:00.000-07:002015-05-15T21:22:04.423-07:00Holy GroundWe awoke to a typical, misty, socked in Oregon morning, to begin our drive north to Seattle. But as we came over the crest of a hill, there was all this glory breaking through the fog. Though we could not see where the road started or ended, the bridge remained clear. We could not let this moment escape, and so we pulled over to the side of the road in amazement and wonder. <br />
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Three years ago my extended family underwent a crisis. When our sister-in-law and unborn baby passed away, our sight was blinded by fog. Yet, each of us sought refuge under the mighty shelter of God, choosing to believe that God is still good, choosing to believe that God had a purpose. The road ahead was clouded, yet we knew it had to be there. <br />
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We were approaching the bridge, my brother's marriage to his new bride. We do not know what lies on the other side, but we do know this. If ever there was testimony to God's power to heal and restore, it was at my brother's recent wedding. The sun was breaking through.<br />
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It seemed a hushed awe, a reverent whisper lingered in each of our hearts, for we knew the wedding we were about to witness was holy ground. Surely, the presence of the Lord was in this place!<br />
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Weathering does not come quickly, but rather has been tested through wear and tear. Each piece uniquely crafted, a delight to the artist, precise details noticed. How much like our lives, (and this wedding in particular), that God would give such depth of love through the pain of the past. Surely, love is sweet, very sweet indeed! <br />
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Weepy eyes spoke from the heart, emotions in conflict . . . yet not, because really, they went together. Ecstatic joy for the new couple, but also grief in remembering. April is perfect after the storm . . . beautiful, refreshing, and most of all, hope.<br />
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As sands poured together, two lives intertwined in God's purpose and grace. Surely, God makes beautiful what is crushed! He forms us into a work of art for the display of His glory. . . a beauty which would not be achieved except by a gathering together of the broken.<br />
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I cannot yet see everything on the other side, but with each passing year, its becoming more clear. By faith I know it to be true. The road goes on into eternity and "every mountain will be brought low, every valley raised up as a highway for our God." <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Isa. 40:3-5)</span> Surely, He makes the way straight before us. He makes all things new . . . yet, vintage. For in our eternal home we will recognize loved ones and our right responses to life's experiences will last, creating this depth of testimony unique to each life. <br />
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Only by the Spirit of God dwelling within us can we always protect, always endure, always trust, always display patience, and . . . always hope. No longer desolate, we "will be called 'The Holy People' and 'The People Redeemed by the LORD.' " (Isa. 62:12) I am so grateful for these two families represented, actually three, redeemed by the Lord, permeating the darkness with light. A wedding drenched with the presence of God. A marriage, begun not by selfish desires or prideful ambitions, but by God's terms. <br />
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Congratulations Jasper and April, for being a "splendid crown in the hand of God," for He has "held you in His hand for all to see" (Isa. 62:3) God has been faithful to give the "crown of beauty for ashes, a joyous blessing instead of mourning, festive praise instead of despair." (Isa. 61:3) Thank you for painting such a beautiful work of art, inspired by the Spirit of God. We look and are amazed, gripped with a hushed awe of our Maker, for this is, no doubt, holy ground. <br />
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<br />Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-54301976507530569522015-05-05T22:13:00.000-07:002015-05-05T22:13:13.402-07:00On HoldIn this season I can scarcely catch my breath. Life has been full and writing slim. In the meantime, here is a bit of family news and a few pictures to catch up. <br />
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Most recently, my oldest daughter returned home from college. We are thrilled to spend a few short weeks together before she returns. Praise the Lord with us for answered prayer to a summer job at a children's hospital. Homemade enchaladas along with all the fixings were the order for her 21st birthday party. <br />
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Jeff and I just completed a season of coaching volleyball for our youngest daughter's team. It was such a joy to coach together as a couple and impact the lives of our team members. At our last volleyball party, we played until dark and then enjoyed the fireworks display from the baseball field next door. <br />
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My flowers are in full bloom, but I have not begun to plant a garden. I missed all the early season crops, but maybe I can still manage some tomato plants before too late. <br />
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Last, but not least, my brother is getting married! All of my siblings will be there and that is saying something since there are 10 of us ranging from the east coast to the west, with some in between. The last time we were all together was for a funeral . . . his wife of six months. I find it a "God thing" that April brings such joy in May. April was the month Sheri died and his new bride is named April. Coincidence? I don't think so. I believe God has great things in store for this union. <br />
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I do not always understand how God can turn an awful situation into something good, but as I look back on my life I catch glimpses of it in the most peculiar places. My heart is warmed and encouraged. Surely, God is interested in the lives of His people and holds them close to His heart. <br />
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Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-47889028947878632002015-04-27T12:04:00.000-07:002015-04-27T21:22:15.013-07:00When It Rains, It PoursI recently announced to my visiting relatives, "In one night we received nearly an inch of rain!" They laughed. Coming from the Pacific Northwest an inch seems like nothing. But from the desert of Colorado it is everything.<br />
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I don't know why, but when the rain sets in to stay for the evening, I sleep really well. Maybe its because of the nostalgia it emits from my childhood where rain was part of everyday life. Or perhaps it is simply the comfort of its rhythm bathing the earth in green. At any rate, I've taken great delight in our recent rains. They seem to speak volumes of God's mercy on our parched land. <br />
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But the cool moisture of outside has entered my heart as well, because "before they call, I will answer; while they are still speaking I will hear". <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Isa. 65:24)</span> I've been treading some dry ground lately, but just in time, the rains have come. God has poured out his mercy in my life and shown me that He is not silent, but rather, very much on the move. <br />
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In a week that seemed overwhelming, God surprised me with some answers. I was at an orientation meeting at the high school, a rather mundane, ordinary, been there, done that, sort of meeting, when out of the blue a contact was made for my daughter. A contact I've been seeking for almost a year. <br />
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God surprised me with yet another answer. Not ahead of time, but just in time, He opened the way for a crucial appointment I had struggled for weeks to obtain. <br />
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Still more, I thought the door was closed on an opportunity, but last week it opened and not just one door, but hints of two. I don't know why or how, but I believe God is cutting me off of ministry in one area so that I might be free for another. Something scary, something new, but a place I want to go because I know it means a burst of growth.<br />
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Because of my crazy, non-stop, activity laden week, I was running out of time to write my last chapter of a Bible study I've been teaching. But God opened up a time slot and enabled me to complete the writing in just a few hours. Furthermore, as I taught said lesson, I sensed the power of His Spirit flowing through me. Plus, God gave me an idea for an activity which cemented all the other lessons together. . . and the time to implement it.<br />
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And then there is last night, where a young man, a teenager of whom much has been invested, gave testimony of his faith through baptism. I was blown away. What a change has come over his life since we first met him. He leads his family in this step of faith. <br />
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Though I've felt spiritually barren these last months, God has given me His promise that He will bring me back to a season of fruitfulness. The last two lessons I've taught for kid's club just "happened" to be on God's promise to Abraham, that he would give him as many descendants as the stars in the sky. God was His shield and protector. Likewise, when Jacob ran into deep conflict with his brother Esau and had to flee to a far away land, God met him in the night with a promise. He would bring Jacob back to this land. It would not be gone to him forever, for God "knows the plans that He has for us, plans to prosper us and not to harm us, plans to give us hope and a future." <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Jer. 29:11)</span><br />
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When it rains it pours. God, though at times silent, is not aloof. Nor is He unaware. He sees. He knows. He waits until just the right time and then opens the floodgates of heaven to pour out His blessing on our hearts. <br />
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I often pray, <i>Lord, open my eyes to see You.</i> God is constantly moving in my life, but I do not always recognize it as from Him. What a shame to miss Him! <i>Adjust the strings, Lord. Align my will with Yours, Jesus. Tune my heart into Your presence. Be lifted high in my life!</i> <br />
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<i>"Yet the LORD longs to be gracious to you;</i><br />
<i>he rises to show you compassion.</i><br />
<i>For the LORD is a God of justice.</i><br />
<i>Blessed are all who wait for him!"</i><br />
Isaiah 30:18Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-33680555500067303422015-04-24T09:40:00.000-07:002015-04-24T09:40:39.855-07:00GratefulWhen I got up this morning and thought about everything that had to be accomplished today and this weekend, I was tempted to go back to bed. <i>How long can I carry on at this pace?</i> <br />
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Weekends generally carry the connotation of rest and relaxation, but for my family, the tempo always increases a few beats. Yet, my heart is full. The presence of the Lord has been so tangible over the last month, His work in my life so visible to me, that I almost feel like an onlooker peering in. <br />
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Just this morning I read that "no one can snatch anyone out of [God's] hand", and that "no one can undo what God has done." <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Isa.43:13)</span> What encouraging words in relationship to my latest storm! Surely, "From eternity to eternity I am God", declares the Lord. It doesn't seem to matter how frazzled I feel, if I know this one thing, that God is with me and that He is in control, then the winds can beat out their furry. Surely, the Lord gives "a peace that passes all understanding!" <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Phil. 4:7)</span><br />
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As the morning rituals began, lunches made and breakfast on the table, I began to sense an attitude change. Something I heard on the radio earlier in the week came back to me. So often I revert back to a sinner saved by grace, which is, in fact, in one sense, what I am. But in reality, it is what I once was. Now I am a saint indwelt by the Holy Spirit who empowers me to live in obedience. The very life of Christ lives in me! What a concept! I think if I really truly grasped this truth it would change my entire attitude. This day is not something to get through nor to dread. Rather, it is an opportunity to know His life lived through me. <br />
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Don't get me wrong. I often fail . . . miserably. In fact, I'm still reeling from my last big mess up. And that's not to mention the smaller, hidden yuck that I battle every day. But I'm learning that if I enter my day with the attitude of who I am in Christ, then the chances for being an overcomer are much higher. <br />
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There are days, even weeks, when I behave like my God is small. The calendar marches on and I just try to keep up. Yet, it seems peculiar that when I simply do the next thing, not knowing how everything else will be accomplished, God shows Himself capable to handle all that concerns me. (A practical definition of faith.) My most hectic days turn into the most rewarding because God delights in showing Himself strong on my behalf. And in this place His presence glows warm. <br />
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Today I am truly grateful. His Word has been like arms wrapping me close to His heart, enfolding me in grace. Much of it is too personal to share here, but I will say this. What seems to be ending in my life, cut off, is only a season of death and burial. It lies dormant so that roots might grow deeper. God has chosen me for fruitfulness and by faith I believe it to be true. Because even though He has done great things in my past, "it is nothing compared to what [God] is going to do. [He] is about to do something new." <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Isa. 43:18-19)</span> God doesn't need me, but he wants me, and my desire is to be about my Father's business. <br />
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<br /><br />Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-29621593833103289732015-04-16T11:44:00.000-07:002015-04-16T11:44:02.403-07:00Cut OffIn one swift motion, the door closes on several areas of my life. Like branches which fall to the ground, they are cut off from fruitfulness, and I grieve the loss. Pruning appears so harsh. It leaves the tree looking awkward, exposed, and stripped of all dignity. <br />
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In my recent musings on the death and resurrection of Christ, I've been brought near to the thought that Jesus was cut off from descendants, cut down in His prime. At the very moment when life was snowballing in success, when crowds followed and impact was immense, He is suddenly brought low. The cross seemed a devastating defeat. <br />
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We know we will share in His glory, but why so reluctant to share in His sufferings? <br />
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I've been waiting on the Lord, because I know that when there are so many "nos", surely He has a "yes" in mind that is far greater than anything I could ever imagine. Yet, when it comes to the building of my character or to personal growth, God never seems in a hurry. Surely, He has appointed me to bear fruit, but in that purpose there must first be a dying to myself, a tamping down of the earth, a burial. And then comes the long wait when it seems nothing is happening. <br />
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Though I have not actively chosen it, God is taking away ministry opportunities, cutting me down in the very area of what I thought were my gifts. It's like He is forcing me to rest, and I can do nothing but be still. Lies whisper spiritual barrenness, a wasteland of prickles and sand. But I know better. <br />
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Just this morning I read that "the wasteland will rejoice and blossom...yes, there will be an abundance of flowers, singing, and joy! The deserts will become as green as Lebanon..." It is "there that the LORD will display His glory". <span style="font-size: x-small;"> (Isa. 35:1-2)</span> <br />
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Yesterday, I was walking in the desert, and now today there is snow, coveted moisture for our drought laden spring. It has not stopped, but continues in big fluffy flakes. Without a sound it falls. So still, so silent, but so effective. <br />
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Over the last month, Thursdays come with tired hands and weak knees. Fear springs up and threatens to choke the life right out of me, and yet integrity would have me finish my commitment. But the Lord says to those with fearful hearts, "be strong" and "do not fear, for your God is coming to destroy your enemies. He is coming to save you." <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Isa. 35:4)</span> And though the context of Isaiah 35 is actually referring to the end of the age when Jesus will come to reign bodily on this earth, because it was my reading for this morning, I believe God's Spirit was speaking to my heart for this day as well. <br />
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Waiting is required in every season, not just that of sowing seed. Just when a tree seems well established and about to flower, there is this stripping of its branches, requiring even more waiting. Yet, as we share in the sufferings of Christ, we will not be utterly destroyed, <b><i>but we might be cut off</i>.</b> However, Jesus, as our risen Lord, has <i><b>adopted</b></i> us into His family where now He reigns with so many descendants they can scarcely be counted! Surely, what is cut off can be grafted back in to produce a beauty that is unique and even fuller than it had been before. <br />
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Almost every day on the way to other places, I walk by this tree, a testimony to the power of God.<br />
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At first glance, this tree appears like any other tree in the park. But a close look reveals something unusual at its trunk, a grafted branch. <br />
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Any other time of the year it remains hidden, but in spring the truth becomes clear. It has defied all odds. What was cut off has been made new. What was devoid of life, now lives triumphant.<br />
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Only by the blood of Jesus can life flourish in this manner, hence the tinge of pink, a soft reminder of the sufferings of Christ which makes me white as snow. <br />
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<i>"And a great road will go through that once deserted land. It will be named the Highway of Holiness. Evil minded people will never travel on it...only the redeemed will walk on it."</i> <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Isa. 35:6-7) </span><br />
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Like a bride who waits in eager expectation for her groom, so I long for the return of Christ, when righteousness will rule. Even so come, Lord Jesus, come! <br />
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<br />Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-59961655852388291142015-04-05T08:14:00.000-07:002015-04-05T08:14:05.857-07:00Why Does It Matter? Certainly, there was no need for the stone to be rolled away. Like Jonah who was spewed from the mouth of a large fish, so the ground could not hold Jesus back. The stone was removed, not to let Jesus out, but to let people in! Jesus <i><b>wanted</b></i> us to look inside. <br />
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He offers an invitation. Come and see! "He is risen, just as He said!" <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Matt. 28:6) </span><br />
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So often we explore the evidence, and it is, indeed, overwhelmingly outstanding! But there is so much more to Jesus' resurrection than proof, for His risen life makes all the difference in ours. Not only do those who place their faith in Christ receive a heavenly home, but we receive power for living . . . today, and for the rest of our lives. We do not have to live in sin and defeat. <br />
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In the natural world, gravity is always present, pulling us down, yet, with a power greater than gravity, such as a jet, we can defy it. Likewise, as long as I dwell on this earth, my natural inclination is to live selfish and proud. However, Jesus' resurrection life fuels me with power to live differently. Because He overcame, I too, can overcome. <br />
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Those of you who've read this blog for some time may be wondering, then, why all these struggles of which I speak? If Christianity is such a journey into trials, why choose it? And I would reply, "Why fly an airplane or climb a mountain? Why watch a bird soar or send a kite on the wind?" We were made for fellowship with God, and are most happy when we live in obedience to Him. Yes, it is a struggle to fight against the gravity of sin, but nothing can compare to the presence of God in the midst of the fight. God is never closer than when we are surrendered to Him. And without Him, we are dead in our sins. <br />
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Though the difficulties cause pain, yet, I would not have it different, for God has shown Himself to be my provider, my shepherd, my comfort, my refuge, my advocate, my strength, my peace, my joy, and so much more. It is through these trials that He shows Himself strong on my behalf, because His Spirit dwells in me. When the hurricane forces come, I know that my roots are established in His love, for nothing can separate me from the love of God. <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Rom. 8:38-39)</span><br />
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This love never fails because it depends on God, not me. It is a continual flow of grace, which is made possible through the blood of Jesus, always ready to forgive and make new.<br />
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Because Jesus rose from the dead, I live. This is not a mere existence, striving to get through the day, but a daily empowering by His Spirit. I can be confident that wherever He takes me, I can thrive in His presence and know His joy. <br />
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Furthermore, I know that "the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that will be revealed in us." <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Rom. 8:18)</span> My time on this earth is only a tiny dot compared to the line of my eternal home which goes on forever. Though I cannot always see, I believe in God's control and trust Him to carry me through, no matter the trial, for He is faithful. <br />
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This is one reason we proclaim with such enthusiasm, "He is risen! He is risen indeed!" <br />
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Come and see for yourself. If you will believe, this Easter will be like none other, for the very life of Christ will set you free from the power of sin and death. Now, that's something worth singing about! <br />
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<i>"and on this rock, I will build my church, </i><br />
<i>and the gates of hell will not prevail against it."</i><br />
<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">(Matt. 16:18)</span> </i><br />
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<i>"in all these things we are more than conquerors </i><br />
<i>through him who loved us." <span style="font-size: x-small;">(Rom. 8:37)</span></i><br /><br />
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Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4051573390097237614.post-87269660870328325672015-04-03T10:46:00.000-07:002015-04-03T10:46:18.457-07:00InjusticeI was in prison, awaiting my penalty, when I heard them coming. Angry they shouted, "Crucify him! Crucify him!" Fear gripped my heart, tightening my throat. Though I knew I deserved it, the thought of crucifixion terrified me. My time had come. Soldiers rattled the iron gate and called me out.<br />
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"You are free to go," they declared. <br />
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What? No crucifixion? Then what of the crowd? Why so angry and who did they mean to crucify? The soldier said it again, "Go!" Without looking back, I ran through the streets, strength filling lungs and legs, the words echoing through my mind, "<i>Free to go, free to go...</i>" <br />
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<i>Life is unfair</i>, we often think when we run up against struggles. Unfair? Surely, if life were fair, death is what we would receive, separation from God forever. Jesus faced injustice at every turn, but the freedom of Barabbas is perhaps the most severe injustice of all. <br />
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The events of these last weeks have placed my life on trial in a way I have never experienced before. And though it is nothing compared to what Jesus went through, yet, to know a tiny taste of His suffering has sharpened my senses to its reality.<br />
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Last night, I watched the movie, <i>Ben Hur</i>. It is a tradition I hold to every Easter, and yet the scene which touches me most deeply is when Judah walks through the leper's cave, searching for his diseased and dying sister. Finding her, he wraps his arms around her frail body and buries his head against her chest, exposing him, a man in his prime, to leprosy. How could it be, that holiness would touch filth? <br />
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Jesus entered this world in a smelly stable. But in His death on the cross, He embraced my filth. He did not stand at a distance. No, love drew Him close, near enough <i><b>to touch the untouchable</b></i>, and in doing so, He was cut down in His prime. Scarcely recognizable, His body brutally beaten, He was cut off from any descendants. <br />
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How can it then be, that heaven is filled with His children? Only because when a seed is planted in the ground and dies, it later produce much fruit. <span style="font-size: x-small;">(John 12:24)</span> Jesus, this tender shoot, the holy seed from the stump of Israel, died, was buried, and then rose in triumph.<br />
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"Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting? Death is swallowed up in victory." <span style="font-size: x-small;">(1 Cor. 15:55 with Isa. 25:8) </span><br />
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One day, I will stand before a holy God and justice will be paramount to my eternal destiny. But herein lies the most severe injustice, for Jesus will say, "You are free." What? Like Barabbas, I experience the injustice of grace, life unfair in my favor because Jesus, an innocent man, took the punishment I deserved. And yet, like a gift, it does not become mine until I receive it, for "if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved." (Rom. 10:9) <br />
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This undeserved favor causes my heart to burst with gratefulness! How deep the Father's love for me, that I should be called a child of God! <span style="font-size: x-small;">(1 John 3:1) </span> The following is the song of my heart, the song of a soul set free. <br />
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<i>How deep the Father's love for us,</i><br />
<i>How vast beyond all measure,</i><br />
<i>That He should give His only Son</i><br />
<i>To make a wretch His treasure.</i><br />
<i>How great the pain of searing loss</i><br />
<i>The Father turns His face away,</i><br />
<i>As wounds which mar the Chosen One</i><br />
<i>Bring many sons to glory.</i><br />
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<i>Behold, the man upon the cross</i><br />
<i>My sin upon His shoulders;</i><br />
<i>Ashamed, I hear my mocking voice</i><br />
<i>Call out among the scoffers,</i><br />
<i>It was my sin that held Him there</i><br />
<i>Until it was accomplished;</i><br />
<i>His dying breath has brought me life-</i><br />
<i>I know that it is finished.</i><br />
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<i>I will not boast in anything,</i><br />
<i>No gifts, no power, no wisdom;</i><br />
<i>But I will boast in Jesus Christ,</i><br />
<i>His death and resurrection.</i><br />
<i>Why should I gain from his reward?</i><br />
<i>I cannot give an answer;</i><br />
<i>But this I know with all my heart-</i><br />
<i>his wounds have paid my ransom.</i><br />
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by Stewart Townend<br />
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<br />Jewelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07010217137148949596noreply@blogger.com0